I'm here because I'm pregnant

In an attempt to find humor in life after today's disappointing visit to the doctor (yup, lots of strong contractions but not progress) I am thinking about things that have lately made me laugh. The top of the list was a recent trip to the OB's where a very young, chipper medical assistant was taking my vitals--she was being incredibly friendly for someone who had never met me before. Anyone who has seen me in the last month knows that I am HUGE! I would wager that I am bigger around than I am tall, but I refuse to verify that. Anyway, this very young, very chipper, girl, cheerfuly asks me, "Are you here to see us today because you are pregnant?" HMMMM..... I couldn't help it and I know it's incredibly rude, but I actually laughed out loud at her. "Yeah," was all I could spit out in my disbelief that she was actually serious. Of course, moments later, after the laughter was controlled, I thought of much better responses: "No, I swallowed an enormous melon," or "I'm just a little bloated." I hope I didn't hurt her feelings too much but it was ridiculous. Her only smiley response to me was, "Well, I always hate to assume these things." HMMMM...OB's office + Huge belly + C-section consultation scheduled on my chart = I'M HERE BECAUSE I'M PREGNANT.